Th Post-Anger Episode Tale

Being angry with everything around you does not solve anything. People are always angry these days. Because they are never satisfied with their lives. I am never satisfied and that angers me. My whinning and my complaining tires me. Why does man have to be so greedy, so insatiable, so ungodly miserable that they only see the bad things in their lives? I am like that most of the times and I hate my greediness because that makes me sad and grumpy and it prevents me from having fun and really enjoying myself. I did not use to be like that, I know. I used to be fun, smiley and so funny. Now I am grumpy, sad and always thinking of how to get by financially. I never use to think about money or its purpose. I never use to care or if I did I wasn't letting them take over my life.Now it seems that they are there in front of me, waiting at every corner, to suck me in, to make me bow to them, and whorship them. I am not a follower of money.I always abhorred money and what it does to people. It has my parents under constant stress and struggle for over twenty five years and I always thought I had to fight against money to not become one of its followers. But here I am. Angry as hell, and I am taking on the money. I hate people who love it and people who whorship it. People who make it their purpose in life and not their means. I hate the fact that people in today's society think that in order to progress you gotta have money, instead of brains or passion or hope. I hate the fact that I am angry. I hate the fact that I am force to be so many miles away from the people I love to be able to fight in order to give them half what they have given me so many years. But most of all I am anrgy I am angry. I am tired of being tired. And I hate it that I hate so many things, instead of expressing all the love and all the goodness in me I am cruel and harsh and I choose the path of loneliness to be able to offer things to others in the near future.

I am not an idealist and I am not a romantic. Although I'd very much like to be one. I am not a realist. I am a person living and beathing. With normal dreams and normal wants and needs. I want love. I will have love. I have love. I am thankful I have my two legs, one left, one right, I am thankful I have my two eyes, two hands and have a voice. I want to voice myself. Not mute it any longer. But I am bound by the social norms sadly. Therefore I will believe more and hope for the best. Calm myself and learn to relax when anger takes over. I will learn how to breathe, steady and with ease. And I will remember to smile and be thankful for the things I have and not be angered by the things I do not have.